#33 - Implant and rant about doctors!!

OMG - how i absolutely hate doctors sometimes! I'm finding the doctors over here (NHS and Private) even more frustrating!

Once I was all settled in the Uk and finally running out of the huge stash of my contraceptive pill I headed of to the NHS clinic to get me some free pills. I looked into the options beforehand since I tend to do loads of research on pretty much anything that I do and wanted to discuss the option of the implant that goes into your arm and your contraception needs are then taken care of for 3 years.... Now this would be heaven to me. 3 years of not having to remember to take the pill every single flippin day ! I've been doing that for 9 years already and I'm tired of it.

I head off and the doctor I see is so stupid that she cant even look up the equivalent of my current pill online - which I was able to do later myself. So I landed up on this horrid Progesterone only pill that caused hell for 3 months!! why i waited that long I'll never know.

Then when i go back the next new doctor finds the correct equivalent pill (I basically told her) and she wont discuss the implant. So i forget out it.

Then after the 3 month trail period where i have to then go back to the clinic and they will give me a 6 month prescription so I don't have to keep coming back. BUT NO!

Now I get a very nice male doctor (the rest were female) that wants to take me through all the options available for me and after a long discussion it is basically his suggestion that the implant would be the best for me. BUT I have to go see one of the doctors there that actually implants it. So I go and make an appointment with the first available one of the 2 names he gave me. This happened to be 2 weeks after seeing the male doctor!!

So yesterday I head off to go get this all sorted and I don't expect it to be a mission - but I was wrong.

She apparently doesn't do the implant anymore cause she hasn't gone through some sort of re-evaluation of her skills or something. And then says well she will try and remember the information - but just wants to look it up to REFRESH her memory !!! I mean really ! So I'm sitting there just getting angry. She proceeds to be very anti it and doesn't want to encourage me to have it. She freaks out when I say that I have a thing about needles (i.e. I don't like them) but ignores the fact that I inform her that I've had body piercings without anesthetic and this is simply just like that in the arm but WITH anesthetic.

But now I'm fuming about all these fucking different opinions and the fact that she is sitting there telling me that I'm silly to want to come off a pill that is working for me. So instead of getting outwardly angry at her I start crying !! I mean really WHAT were my emotions thinking !! I suppose it didn't help that I was a little PMS-y. Damn was I now even more angry at the situation.

I'm not stupid - I've looked long and hard into this and in my head I'm willing to try something that could turn out to make my life SO much easier and happier. I know that it could go the other way and I might end up having another horrid 3 months. But then I'll just have the thing taken out and it will stop immediately. I'm not going in blind here !!!

So I manage to still get her to give me the prescription - which i will have to go and get the implant for a chemist and then make another appointment with the other woman to go back and get her to put it in.

BUT here is the thing that got me even more fucking freaked out... The doctor yesterday then turns around after talking to me about this for 5 mins and says "well I would like you to come back and talk to me about what is troubling you in your life - because there obviously is something"
OMFG - IS she seriously telling me I need to come for counselling!!!! Fucking hell !! after talking to me after a minorly frustrating day at work (that is all) that I have something wrong in my life. Damn I was just flabbergasted!

Ok - so I admit that my life hasn't been the peachiest but I think I'm one of the most grounded well rounded happiest person I know. I'll still have a positive outlook even when I'm having the baddest day. This has been how I've triumphed over the worse parts of my CFS and not been kept down by it like many many other people.

Right now at this moment in my life I'm so very happy! Its the healthiest I've ever been, the most in love that i've ever been, the most comfortable with myself i've ever been, the most well off financially then i've ever been. So please tell me what this woman could possibly offer me that I dont already have/know.

She does not know me...and I will not be put down by her opinions of me.

But sadly i'm now back at square one about whether to have this implant or not - ARG!