Teary Thursday

Well today started off badly! I got an email from Miss Unhinged and it was the most confusing toned email and upset me no end. I think that it was just a last straw after so many other events that i've ignored. She would throw in little "nice" comments between her tell me off for no reason. The 2 hour lunch came up again. She accused me of leaving things unnecessarily undone until her return to the office, and the main thing was to sit and do space plans and dont help other people or start 'networking' in the office. Basically she doesnt like me talking to anyone ! it drives me up the wall as I am a very social person and dont enjoy sitting infront of a computer all day and not saying a word to the people around me. I have had no complaints from them that it distracting them and they have actually said it makes it easy to approach me when wanting help.

I was just so angry and emotional! I hate being like that as I see it as a weakness so who knows what other people think. But i just knew that I couldnt let this one slide. I was planning to speak to my boss about it at some stage but as soon as I stepped into the office he just knew something was really wrong and approached me and I landed up showing just how upset I was which upset me even more.

Anyway we went for a long chat and a hot chocolate. (yes yes i know I failed to stay away from the chocolate today. But it truely was the most devine hot chocolate - or should I say chocolate soup!!! It was so insanely thick that I had to stir it the whole time to stop it from becoming solid. The place that serves this divine stuff is Apostrophe ) He was great and helped me work things out for myself and try and see all her side of things etc and teaching me methods for conflict resolution.

After that the day went pretty well as I got to have lunch bitch to Persia (Designer & friend that sits across from me) and then we also made plans to go shopping after work and retail therapy was def needed :)

Once Miss Unhinged got back to the office she was all sugar and sweetness and didnt even notice anything was upsetting me. (even tho post her being at work others were still noticing that something was up) For once I was able to calmly confront someone and bring up what was bothering me. We had a chat and it was all nice and stuff but now that she was all appologetic etc she still made me feel like i was over reacting and that it wasnt such a big deal.

Basically she STILL confuses the hell out of me and I HATE being all emotional! My boss says that I will become harder and that I just tend to be very feelings orientated even in the way I perceive other people. I'll learn to turn down the volume button on that when needed to.

He also confided in me that he has been given alot of negative feedback about her attitude and that she doesn't seem to have enough respect for the directors including him. So I don't feel so unvalidated in my feelings.

What an up and down day ...but ending on a good note with some much needed shopping in Zara and a few other stores :)

Pitch

So the pitch is overs, so the serious stress of the last 3 weeks is overs! So today was my first day attempting to cut down on chocolate. And it seems to be working out better then I thought. i broke down at about 11am and had a single minstrel (chocolate button type thing) It did however help that we were taken out by a lighting company to a 2 hour long lunch! so basically was at my desk for less hours of the day and therefore not being taunted by the bag of chocolate on my desk! 

But dispite my happy mood or because of it Miss Unhinged (my senior designer - who we work as a 'team') decided to ruin the afternoon with her insane demand, snide comments and general all around bad attitude. She seemed to be unhappy with the 2 hour lunch that "I" had decided to take and seemed to want to lash out at everyone around. I would just like to point out at this point that the lunch was a design dept event that both she and I rsvp'd to go and then she decided to take lunch with her boyfriend that she lives with anyways. I was at this lunch with my boss and he had no problem with us taking off some time for lunch after working so hard on the pitch. I am completely confused by here. So i landed up staying at work until 19:30 helping out the other design support guy as she had given him a whole load to do with a deadline of tonight and told him unequivocally not to leave until it was done! I dont understand her and sometimes i think she just enjoys the power trip! Not to mention that majority of the time I think she is just trying to hide her massive insecurities. 

Anyways - besides her multiple unhinged personalities she and I did happen to put together a great design for the pitch yesterday and the presentation as a whole including loads of work from the other departments was apparently one of the best presentations that the people in the company had ever seen done there. So at least we do seem to be producing some good work together - which is a good thing and it will mean winning more jobs and then getting better bonuses :) 

So that is enough of my ranting! Am def exhausted but in a much better mood then the one i left the office in thanks to the lovely bf and the housemate! They do make me laugh hysterically ! And we watched a cute little movie called Dedication which made you realise that there were alot more crazy unhinged (but in a good way) out there! But now am off to sleep land now to recharge the batteries and prepare for tomorrow afternoon (thankfully I will not have Miss unhinged designer in the office tmr morning). 

Chocolate Addiction

I have a problem, it is an addiction and I can't break the cycle. I am a chocolate addict! And of late it is all my bosses fault!

He started it all off by sharing his chocolate cravings with the design dept by coming in every afternoon with a bag of chocolate for everyone. Then once we were all used to the afternoon chocolate fest we would start demanding chocolate which meant that one of us would make a chocolate and sugary drinks run at least every second day.

For these chocolate runs we started putting together a whip for chocolate (explanation of whip click here) and it has evolved into a kitty of money that gets collected and kept for these occasions.

The main problem comes in with the fact that it has become my responsibility to keep the kitty and buy the chocolate which means that the chocolate stash sits on MY desk! This had lead to my outright addiction to chocolate and my inability to be able to go without chocolate even for a day.

As we have been seriously stressed out at the moment putting together a huge pitch presentation and design scheme the need for high energy sugar laden snacks has increased. This now means that I find it difficult to resist the 10 am chocolate snack to start the day off. And then by 8/9 pm when we have been knocking off work I've gone through about 4-6 chocolates.

But seriously after this pitch is out of my life (Wednesday) no more chocolates ..... Until easter that is, well I am only human and this is chocolate we are talking about :)

Role reversal

All my life I have had situations where I've admired and wanted to emulate things in people that were older then me, better then me at whatever etc. My first example is that in my late teens I had always picked people of about 23 to be in awe of. I thought that once you where about 23 you would have things sorted. Knew what you wanted to do with your life, finished studying or nearly finished. It felt like everyone I knew of that age just seemed so sorted.

Then suddenly I was nearly 23 and I didn't have a clue what I was doing, hadn't finished studying and was just working a full time job to earn cash to live in the now. I was still out causing trouble like a teen in my social life and generally having a ball tho. Then one night this 16 year old girl turned around and said that she hopes she is just like me when she is older as I have things so sorted.

I was completely shocked. There I was the girl that admired the older girls suddenly inspiring younger girls. But I didnt feel that different or that I had it any more sorted then I did when I was younger.

This strange role reversal happened to me again the other day....



When I started climbing I used to sit in the cafe area by the extremely high (to me) wall and watch the other lead climb. I loved to watch the female climbers and was in awe of what they could do and how graceful they were. I would sit there and tell myself that that is how I want to climb. I really didnt expect to be climbing so soon but we have come along fast we we started to lead climb only about 5 months after the first time we went climbing. It was New years Day and what a great moment. (see previous entry on starting climbing here)



So last week I did a lead climb on the high wall, about 15m (the highest in the climbing gyms of London I am told - see here for photo) The climb was challenging and I felt like I thugged my way up to the top. I was so exhausted from the whole afternoon climbing and had pumped out my arms on other routes. But I was still determined to finish this route 1st time so carried on hauling myself up the wall in what I thought was not my usual gracefulness.

Was completely exhausted and finished after that route and after watching friends climb and belaying a bit C and I decided to go home. Now this is the crux of my story - As I was getting my bag out of my locker the chick sitting my the lockers looked up and went 'oh hi, I was watching you climb up by the cafe and you did that so beautifully'. I was completely shocked. I'd forgotten that there would be people watching me from the cafe. I had actually blanked out the whole world and only the climb had mattered (I think this is one of the reasons I love climbing) But once again there was the role reversal. This was a chick who had just started climbing and was in awe of me and my climbing skills. Even when I didnt think I was at the level that I admired someone else did. I find it all very surreal.

Ads, Cheating and UK men

As I was travelling to work this morning and standing on my home tube station platform with nothing else to do but read the large poster avertisments. I think it was one of the first times that I was truely shocked and sickened by an ad. And the sad thing is that I don't think it was trying to be shocking at all!
It was an ad for a used car dealership (I think) and basically was saying that this guy has a long face cause his wife is nagging for a new car but he went down and bought a great used car and saved a bundle of money.
Ok right so far it is your usual stereotyped ad nothing too shocking. But now the last line of the poster say that you now have some extra money to go on a naughty weekend away to Paris... With the girlfriend!
No wonder most of the morals of the men here in the uk are fucked up with this blaise attitude to cheating! I can tell you that if I look at the men in our office as a model of the men in the uk then 80 percent of men will not give a second thought to their wives as they cheat on them. Or girlfriends for that matter that happen to have their children as well.
I am always amazed at the ease at which these guys will flirt and cheat but now I see that maybe it isn't just the guys fault but the fact that it seems to be so socially acceptable!
No wonder females here can be so insecure and attempt to be so controlling which is a vicious cycle as that drives the guys more away from the girlfriends and wife into the easy flirting cheating way.

DOWNLOAD FESTIVAL 08

YAY - *happy dance*

I have got us tickets for the Download music festival !! YAY. This will be my first music festival in the UK and an super excited. It is def all the music I like and C does too but not as much as me. But what an experience it is going to be !! 3 days of camping out with a seriously crazy crowd and rocking out to some bands with ever more crazy crowds !! I cant wait :)

So far the line up is:
Kiss
Judus Priest
Him
Offspring
Lost Profits
Disturbed
Incubus
Coheed and cambria
Alter Bridge
Motohead

and a few others that I dont know... but there are still so many more to be announced.

I'm also seriously impressed that I got tickets - I'm a huge fan of www.livenation.co.uk. I've gotten tickets before they have gone on sale to the general public as you get presales options if you sign up.

So far I've bought the following tickets:
KORN
Show tickets for a bday present
Jack Johnson tickets

And of course there are plans to take advantage of being in the UK to see all the bands that I would love to see. You just have to be on the ball as the big artists sell out seriously quickly. Foo fighters sold out their concert in June within the first 45 mins of sales as I tried to get ticket at 09:50 and they went on sale at 09:00.

Crazy stuff... Anyways so def have some exciting music experiences on the way this year :) YAY !! (i've already said that right ?!?! lol)

Happy Valentines Day

Well Happy Valentines day to everyone - hope they all felt loved yesterday and everyday!

I just have the mention that all my planning for Valentines day was refered to as VD planning by C. So typical of his sense of humour and it would crack me up everytime ! So actually planning was very chilled anyway and the was happily no pressure put on me/us to do anything - but hey why not, any excuse for a dinner and some theater :)

When I woke up yesterday I so didnt want to get up and face the work day - I just wanted to stay curled up with C for most of the day :) But of course we have to earn a living or something so headed off to work for a very hectic day playing with VERY frustrating drawings that I just wanted to murder by the end of the day ! The drawings also made me very thankful that I hadnt chosen to go into Architecture cause their drawings are seriously insanely complex and gave me a freaking headache - I so couldnt deal with those drawings everyday! I like the nice simplified versions that we create for the design and build fit out industry.

I of course couldnt wait to hand over my present to C to open - I'm terrible when it comes to waiting to see people open thier presents from me :) I got him a Taste London membership which gives you 50% off or 2 4 1 deals at about 600 london resturants for a year. So basically its a present for me too! :)

Half way through the afternoon just when I needed a pick me up there arrived roses for me and my present :) So am still looking at the beautiful boquet at the moment and wondering how entertaining it is going to be taking them home tonight !! The present was a membership with Lovefilm.com which is a rental situation where you have a list of 10 movies at a time and then they send you the dvd of one of those and you keep it as long as you want and then when you return it via the free postage they send you the next one. It sounds like a great idea and I've heard it from the intellectuals that it works well for them. So it turned out (as C put it) that we bought each other 'team' gifts. I.e both gifts are for both of us. I think it was very clever if i say so myself.

Due to our laid back planning we did not have a restaurant booked near the theater and even though there are literally hundreds of restaurants in the area they were pretty much all fully booked or would involve a very long waiting list. If you go there on a normal weekend night it is also pretty much impossible to get in to eat anywhere without having to do the waiting list thing. So we just popped down to the Pizza Express which is one of C's fav pizza chains.

After dinner we then headed off to the musical, Spamalot. This is the stage version of Monty Python and the holy grail which is one of my most favorite Monty Python movies!! I just love the random sense of humour! And they did a brilliant job of it. I SO recommend anyone to go and see it - it is so worth it! The 2 hours and 20 minutes felt too short and I definitely wanted more and was sad to see it end - I think everyone felt that way as there was endless cheering and synchronized applause from the crowd. And then a great sing-a-long to 'always look on the bright side of life' (damn that song gets stuck in your head !!!)

I seriously LOVE monty python ! And have done since I was a little kid - yes I know I had weird parents that showed me these strange things from an early age !



Anyways, so the rest of the night is just for my memories - but i have to say it was def one of the best Valentines days so far - Thanks C !

Anthony McCall

On Friday the entire design dept got to take off the afternoon and head off to an art exhibition. The exhibition was at the Serpentine Gallery in Hyde Park and was showing the work of a British artist called Anthony McCall . More info on the exhibition here.



This is one of the most amazing exhibitions that i've seen. You were complete invloved and interacting with the installation. As you walked through the projectected light it would change and morph and we had great fun doing silly things with the projections to make the other designers laugh.

He is a truely multi talented person with a highly evolved sense of the world and its working. Hes maths and architecture as well as film and drawing. He is the balance between logical and creative. Theses were very mathamatical instalations with titled 'Between you and me'. So they are very personal and human at the same time and the more time that you spend interacting with the installation you can see what he is trying to say about human interaction without even having to be intellectual about it.

This was def an experience that I wont forget!

After the exhibition a few of use stayed on to have cocktails at the nearest bar and then headed off for dinner in Soho on a friday night. So if you live here you will know that it is almost impossible to find a resturant with a table for 7 people if you havent booked as they are all so popular and the area is so busy that you have to wait in queues for pretty much every resturant!

Somehow my boss talked his way into a resturant called Floridita. This is def an awesome place to go for a night out! We had a huge booth table which fitted the 7 of us perfectly. It is a cuban restruant and we even had a live cuban band providing entertainment. As dinner when on and we ate some stunning food. I had the most devine steak, it slowly becomes a club as well with couples coming onto the lovely wooden dance floor infront of the tables and dancing. But we are not talking the bored club type dancing, I'm talking the real deal !! Salsa and jive and tango and all the latin dancing that you can think of. And everyone could dance like professionals - it was great to watch. I did land up spending sometime on the dance floor later with a fellow designer with us just having fun and looking seriously amatur as we just danced to our own style (i.e. none what so ever). I def recommend this place to anyone wanting a good night out!

The evening did take a strange slant with a senior deisgner and myself in the sex shop having a great laugh and him chasing me round with a FAT chick blow up doll box! Was def a great friday night out !

Postsecret

One of the most interesting sites that i've read as well as the whole concept which has lead to books and seminars etc is one of the most simple yet effective ideas. This is the postsecret site.
I love to visit the blog and scroll endlessly through the thoughts of other people. I came across this one and I related to it the most that day.

I think that this is why I love climbing so much - just the idea that I could fall and feel it without actually dying as such. When I tell people that i'm afraid of heights not because of the idea that I could fall but because of secretly wanting to fall I normally get very strange looks!

I think that anyone could find one little postcard on postsecret to relate to and it always makes you fell less alone in this world.

He's back !!

So my lovely gorgeous fantastic bf is finally back in London from Argentina all full of stories!! Honestly I have no idea how these guys (correction people as there was a female in the group) got through the whole experience. The more and more I hear about the conditions the more I think i'd happily stay in bed thank you very much. But I do see how the whole experience was so worth it in the end. Even with the -25 degree C, frost on your sleeping bag, peeing in a bottle, walking while unable to breath properly for 6 hours a day at the end you have gone through something truely extreme with a great bunch of people that you have bonded with in a way that you have no idea. But I dont know how happy I am to hear that a certain tentmate was trying to spoon with my bf!!



I would also just like to point out that even though everyone said not to be overly concerned about the risks, that is was just a "walk up a hill" I was still concerned and with good reason! Out of the starting group of 12: 2 got strep throat, 1 didnt have enough oxygen getting to his blood and 1 got pulmonary edemia (spelling?) which is fluid on the lungs from the altitude which can be deadly. There was also a guy from another group (and expedition company) died in one of the camps on the mountain while C was at that camp.

Only 4 of the group made it to the summit. C was the last to pull out of the summiting attempt and made it to 6800m!! which is absolutly amazing ! Am so proud of him!

I have to say that i'm SO very happy to have him home - even with all the teasing and torturing and general mayhem that he brings with him!

Noisy Neighbour

Ok I swear I cannot for the life of me figure out what the lady upstairs does when she is at home!! She seems to strut up and down the apartment and stomping around like a freaking elephant. And then there are the days like tonight where it sounds like she is dragging furniture around and dropping it every 5 minutes!

There are moments that I think that the ceiling is going to come down it is shaking so much. And lately she has caused such violent vibrations with the movements that the glass in our windows down here is rattling in the window frames !!

Seriously this is just TOO much - SHUT THE FUCK UP ! I seriously think that this is way more annoying then loud music or othe usual noise from neighbours.

I've started having these moments when i try and dream up what she is actually doing. I'm thinking that she has serious OCD and has to rearrange the furniture for psychological reasons otherwise she cant leave the room. Another theory is that she is a serrial killer and murders people up there and then hacks them up and drags the body parts around. And that would also explain how she causes water to pour through our bathroom ceiling (see post re toilet seat) as she would need to clean up the mess with loads of water !!

OMG it is nearly midnight and she is vacuming !!! Fuck me this is ridiculous. And it just really sucks that I cant go up there and ask her what the hell she is doing cause it is seriously disturbing. I even have thoughts about making a sound recording of her thumping around to play back to her. But alas it shall not be.

Well am going to try and get to sleep if she will let me !

Online Wall street journal

I found out this morning that i have a refferal link on the wall street journal site !! I still cant beleive is cause I seriously thought that very few people even looked at my blog. It is quite something to see that not only are people reading it that they are even putting up links to it ! This is a very proud moment for me. And may even encourage me to blog some more. I have a few post ready to go up as well as planning on putting up some more designer things that i've found along the way etc.

Well I do hope that the people out there that are reading my blog are enjoying it. And please feel free to leave any comments etc.

Thanks to all that read me stuff as it has given me a very good start to a monday morning :)

Things that boss wanted to do to me on thursday

Ok this is so not a kinky thing - sorry to dissapoint some.

For one of the first time I landed up in a wierd mood at work. One of my typically overtired hyperactive weird moods that I havent had in ages. It wasnt helped by the fact that the printers were pissing me off. So there I was screaming across the office for the studio manager to fix it all and NOW. And then ensued much feet stamping, hand flapping, high pitch squealing tantrum. This was much more fun then actuall working.

My boss them picks up his tape measure and starts pulling out the tape and edging it over the work bench to me...this was to measure how far away my desk is so that he could rule that I had to stay 3.5m away from him when freaking out about printers!!

Then he started to discuss if they would be able to stick me to the ceiling and leave me there. We have a machine that you roll paper through and it gets a very sticky layer of glue on the back. They were wanted to put me through that and then stick me to the ceiling.

But then if they stuck me to the ceiling they would still be able to hear me so then the next plan was to get a rope and tie it round me and then into the window cleaners safty hook and throw me out the window (we are on the 5th floor btw) Then since my boss was in some want to chocolate they thought it would be a good idea to throw me out the window that was above the shop down stairs so that I could go fetch chocolate !

So after fixing my printing issues the studio manager headed off in search of sweet things and came back with the biggest stash of chocolate and fizzy drinks (that have lasted 2 days) And even though they tried to deny me more sugar I got my way and was on a very happy sugar high for the rest of the afternoon :)

Was good to have some fun at the design bench :) Think it was the joke emails fault that caused my boss to go hunting joke videos all afternoon - and all friday come to think of it - they were being such little boys !! But talk about great atmosphere.